


Be Grateful He's Amused

by moonwings



Category: Rosario + Vampire
Genre: Non-Human Tsukune
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 09:13:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27848334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonwings/pseuds/moonwings
Summary: New take on a non-human Tsukune fic. Read to end to find out what!
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	Be Grateful He's Amused

Be Grateful

There was always something vaguely disconcerting about Aono Tsukune. It sent shivers down people's spines and they scurried out of his sight more often than not, never knowing exactly _why_ they decided to be anywhere else but in front of him.

For all intents and purposes, he seemed like a model student. His disguise was absolutely flawless, right down to the scent. There was no trace of monster, no accidental slip-up where a monster trait snuck out. He was also very friendly with never a rude word about anyone, always seemed to have a kind smile on his face and apparently was never perturbed even when explosions or fights broke out next to him.

He was also rather good academically, always and constantly in second place across every subject. When asked he replied very reasonably that it was never good to stand out _too_ much in anything. The entire point of disguise was to be unremarkable and not memorable. Practically no one remembers second place, while it was still good enough to open the doors you wanted.

However… there was something _wrong_ about him. It would be more comforting to actually know exactly _what_ , like how a child's fear losses it's terror in revealing the identity. Tsukune felt like a monster in the dark, the thing under the bed, the hair that stood up on the back of your neck when you were sure you were alone.

The fights around him? They _avoided_ him. No matter how determined the two combatants were on killing each other, some tiny part of their brain warned not to get _him_ involved, even if it meant taking a wound to turn the fight away.

And his smile? It was polite, but there was something that terrified you at the same time. He looked _amused_ more than anything, like he was looking at a particularly cute puppy who didn't know not to bark at a guest. He looked at everyone like it was interesting to be here and he was willing to watch the drama. And no matter how normal his eyes were there was something _wrong_ with them. Looking at them sent a guttural shudder through you and your mind _screamed_ to _run_.

So his high school career proceeded fairly peacefully, with the only oddity that he had no friends and the club he joined asked practically nothing of him.

Eventually the Security Enforcement Committee decided to confront him. Not because of any problem he caused, but because his disguise was just a little _too_ perfect. They accused him of being human and hiding that fact.

He looked amused, wry smile twisting his lips and head cocked, not at all threatened by the screaming threatening Committee members in front of him, all trying to provoke a fight.

"I think this would be best solved with the Headmaster's help," he said calmly, rising from his desk and walking languidly to the front of class. "Sensei, would you mind letting me clear up this misunderstanding?"

"Of course," she said, avoiding his eyes. "The Headmaster can explain, I'm sure." She turned to the Security club, "Security Committee Members, please escort Aono-san to the Headmaster's office. Do not touch him otherwise. The Headmaster will resolve this issue."

The Security Enforcement members chuckled with glee and followed him out the door.

"Going to die now!" Keito chuckled. "Let's see how the Headmaster reacts to you being here!"

"The Headmaster is the one who approved my application. Why should he be upset that I came? If you insist on verifying that I'm not human, then I need both his permission and his help to undo my disguise. Technically I _could_ show you myself, but I don't want to damage my work making this camouflage."

"You can keep talking but there's no way out of this now!" Sojon crowed, licking his lips. Kuyou smiled in the background.

Tsukune just gave a tolerant sigh and continued on his way. He knocked politely on the door of the Headmaster's office. "Headmaster? May I come in?"

"Of course Mr. Aono."

The door opened easily and the group walked in. Oddly, the Headmaster actually looked very busy so it seemed strange that he'd put everything aside just to kill a human.

"These… _vigilant_ students," Tsukune said with an irony-laden smile, "believe that I am a human who has somehow snuck into this school. I thought it best to bring the matter to you."

The Headmaster inhaled sharply. "Thank you Aono-san," he said, dipping his head slightly before turning to the club members. "I can assure you all that Mr. Aono is definitely not human."

"Bullshit. His form never slips, he smells so _perfectly_ human, and no one has ever seen any abilities. No way he's a monster," Deshiko sneered.

"His human form was something he worked very hard on to create," the Headmaster replied. "He made it very detailed, but it is just that - a disguise. I insisted it to be flawless before he would be admitted. I also put extra spells over it to resist removal."

"Why would you put that kind of effort into a regular student?" Kuyou asked, obviously not believing him. "It sounds like you're just making excuses for your failure."

"I do not believe we can convince them otherwise. Might I suggest Headmaster that we give them what they want?"

The Headmaster's eyes widened in horror. "You gave me your _Word_ -"

"That I would remain in my human form for so long as it was desired by the school and that I would do no _lasting_ harm to any on it's grounds," Tsukune stated. "That just means that I can't break my disguise - someone could _look in_ , and "no lasting harm" doesn't mean _no harm_ \- just that it can't last."

"What do you propose?"

"Remove just enough of your sealing to allow a brief look for someone to verify and have the means to remove the memory from the person who looks," Tsukune shrugged lazily.

The Headmaster cocked his head, considering.

"What are you hiding Headmaster?" Kuyou demanded. "Is this just an act to erase our memories so we won't tell anyone of your failure?"

.

The Headmaster sighed. "You will not injure them?" he asked.

Tsukune gave him a disbelieving mocking look.

"No more than you can help?" the Headmaster amended.

"I will not attack them. They won't even get a bruise."

The Headmaster sighed, very exhausted and dispiritedly. "The rest of the bargain will still be intact?"

Tsukune grinned, too many teeth and too far, too white and too bright. It sent the first shiver of doubt up the Committee's spines.

"I will still take care of _Him_."

The Headmaster suddenly looked very old as he stood up. "Select who will verify," he ordered as he took talismans out of his desk and started drawing symbols on them. "Only _one_."

The Committee looked unnerved at the sudden capitulation and glanced among themselves. Kuyou would have wanted to verify himself, but now found he did not want to be the one to do so.

"I will do it," Taijo announced, stepping forward, thumping his chest with a ham of a fist. "Like anything the pipsqueak could do would do anything to _me_."

Tsukune looked greatly amused. The Headmaster sighed, aggrieved, and walked to the display chest, looking through the weapons.

"I suggest the Severance Dagger," Tsukune said casually, leaning against the massive desk, legs lazily crossed, one arm in a self hug and examining the nails on his other hand. He looked utterly disinterested.

The Headmaster hesitated, then retrieved the recommended item. It was a beautiful scabbard, jewel encrusted, covered in carved runes, talismans, and charms carved into the stones and every piece of the golden covering. The handle however looked like a bone and when it was pulled from the sheath the blade was an ebony black stone blade that was discomforting to look at.

"Will it survive?"

"No. But I'll replace it in a few years with something better."

The Headmaster looked mournfully at the blade.

Tsukune straightened and started removing his coat and shirt.

"What are you doing?" Kuyou asked suspiciously.

"You want to verify right? I figured the best area to do that would be on the back. Good large area." He dropped his clothes on the desk disinterestedly, presenting his back to the Headmaster and holding out his hand.

The Headmaster carefully pricked a finger with the blade - what were they making such a big deal about, destroying the blade? It was just a prick! - then placed his talisman brush against it to collect the blood. He moved to Tsukune's back, placing one of the written talismans at the top of the spine and started drawing symbols down the vertebral column. Exactly _what_ the symbols were the Committee couldn't see from their angle, but the skin hissed at the writing and the air filled with the smell of burnt flesh.

Reaching nearly to his waist, the Headmaster finished and beckoned Taijo over, angling Tsukune so he was facing the Committee and they had no view at all of his back. He handed the knife to Taijo and slapped a different talisman to his forehead quickly.

"Ow! What's this for?" Taijo demanded, reaching to pull it off.

" **Don't pull it off** ," the Headmaster ordered, voice harsh and demanding obedience. "You'll thank me for it in a few minutes." He moved Taijo to stand behind Tsukune. "Stab here," he pointed at the top, just under Tsukune's talisman, "and pull down to here," he pointed to just shy of where the symbols stopped. " **No further** ," he stressed.

Taijo eyed the expanse of skin. The symbols blurred a bit to his eyes and he didn't like them. "Stab?"

"I'd think you'd be ecstatic," Tsukune laughed. "Afterall if I _am_ human you're basically going to despine me."

Taijo flushed in anger, plunging the knife in viciously and turning the blade a bit.

"There we go, that wasn't too hard was it?" The Committee flinched at how unconcerned Tsukune was at the wound, how amused he sounded. Taijo pushed the knife in to the hilt, hoping for some reaction and only receiving a huff of mocking laughter. He drew the knife down the spine, waiting for a cry of pain. The Committee winced at the injury, not understanding how such a wound in such a critical area didn't seem to faze Tsukune in the least. He looked amused, indulgent even, like handing a candy to a kid.

Reaching the bottom, Taijo pulled out the blade, but it was only the handle and a melted stub left. They all blinked at it for a moment before Taijo looked to the cut. It wasn't bleeding.

"You're not bleeding," he noted, wondering for the first time if this was a _bad_ idea.

"Of course not. No reason to," Tsukune explained. "My disguise is perfect but there's no reason to waste bits of it needlessly. Of course if you wanted to you could gut me and you also wouldn't find any trace of anything _not_ human either. It is how I want it to be when I want it that way."

_Definitely_ a bad idea, Taijo concluded, but now his curiosity was irresistible. Just what _was_ Tsukune. A human and most every monster he knew of would be either dead or lethally injured from having their spine stabbed through and opened, and Tsukune wasn't even _bleeding_.

"You know you have to look inside to verify right?" Tsukune asked, crossing his arms lazily.

Taijo hesitated and the Headmaster quickly looked away when the troll finally reached forward and peeled the two flaps of skin back. The rest of the Committee saw the skin flaps stretch to either side of Tsukune's chest easily.

Taijo looked at the black void inside Tsukune's skin and suddenly felt _very_ vulnerable. Like his last shield had been removed and was now staring down an unsurviveable blow. It wasn't even dark or black under Tsukune's skin. It was _void_. He knew intrinsically that he could stick his arm in and it would meet no resistance. There was nothing _there_. Then, something moved. His eyes searched desperately. How could he see movement in a sightless void? But he was suddenly aware that there was _something in there, looking back at him_.

He flinched away. He'd verified Tsukune wasn't human. No human had a void inside them. His work was done. He didn't _want_ to know further.

Something shot out and grabbed his tie, pulling him forward. He scrambled for purchase but even his strength and weight did not slow the creature's implaccable draw. It was like fighting a tidal wave. Right when he was on the point of overbalencing and impossibly falling _into_ Tsukune's back, _something_ brushed against his cheek, lightly, playfully.

̝̥̭̬̎̑ͦ͜l̼̻̳̖ͯ͒͞ ̧̼̈̀̍ͭ́͗ ̮̰͓̝̩͙̥̏̃͂͑̋ ̴͎͔̖̃̅̋̾̆̉̉ ̡͈̼͙̲̥ͪ̈̄̿ͅ ̘̞͌̋͛͋̎̚ ̤͍̞̝͇̫̖̅̓ ̡͈̼͙̲̥ͪ̈̄̿ͅ Ȋ̝̳͇̳̈́͊̆̑̚ ̖̤̖͕͙̓̍̂ͅ!̨͊̑̒!̨͊̑̒ ̤͍̞̝͇̫̖̅̓?̝̘͉̩ ̩̯͊̔̿ͯ͜Ĭ̦̣̬͒̽̿ͣ̅͘ ̭͚̠͊ͭ ̟̼͉̪̼̀̾̉̉͒̋ͧ ̣͚̿́!"!͔̰͓͎̝͎̌ͫ̓͒̽ͤͭͨ͛̑͠͝ͅ"

b͇̘̳̫͉̊̔e̲̰͍͛l̛͑̓̍͌̋̚i̷͔̳̇̈́̊̐ͧͯĕ̠͍̯̼͖͈͋͛͠v͈̪̜͙ͣ͗͌͗ͣ̔ĕ̠͍̯̼͖͈͋͛͠ ̵̪͍̭̂͊ͩͯ̍̅̓M͈͓̠͙͇͎ͪͫ̃ͤ̄ͦ͞e̖͓̮̝ͭ͂ͅ ̘͙͋͊̄̍́̕n͕ͣ̅́̕o̟̤̫͗̔͠w̽̀ͦ?̖̽̅͆͌̀?̨̠͍͇͉͈̫̃"

His mind _burned_. The light was _just_ enough to illuminate a tiny speck of _**something that shouldn't exist**_. His mind scrambled away from it, skittering sideways to run. His eyes and ears refused the reality and he felt his mind tremble like glass pushed to the harmonic shattering point.

He _screamed_ and the thing he refused to think about _laughed_ as it let him go. It _let_ him go. There was no _escaping_ , no running, no refuge. He only existed now _because it found him amusing_.

He scrambled to put distance between them and sensed more than saw the thing smile. It was like the air vibrated, no, like _space_ vibrated with its amusement. It shook his insides and his mind skewed.

The Headmaster suddenly grabbed the talisman on his forehead and _tore_ it off. Taijo's mind settled some. His memories settled back to when it had first been put on. He knew time had passed, but his brain shuddered away from everything else, raw and naked, vulnerable and terrified, knowing the only reason it wasn't screaming and _dying_ was that the thing that could hunt it couldn't be bothered to.

The talisman in the Headmaster's hand was now pitch black and the paper itself trembled. He lit it on fire and it _screamed_ and was _grateful_ for being destroyed.

The room went to silence abruptly as Taijo heaved like he'd just run a marathon, his heart raced fast enough he thought he might _welcome_ a heart attack, his muscles trembled with horror and he _knew_ he was never doing _anything_ violent ever again, just so as to never be _seen_. He didn't want to be _seen_.

He broke down crying. "Thank you," he gasped to the Headmaster. "Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!"

The rest of the Committee were freaking out internally. From their vantage they couldn't see Tsukune's back, or what exactly happened behind him. Taijo had leaned in to look, frozen with a look of stark horror on his face, then fallen forward. There had been _some_ kind of sound, something that… didn't really translate. It trembled in their bones and thrummed in their chests, like their ears had decided not to listen, not to _hear_. Taijo had _screamed_. Screamed like they'd never heard anyone scream in their lives, desperate, horrified, terrified out of his mind, nearly to insanity. He'd fallen back suddenly and there was another sound that didn't exist. It was in the space of their cells which shivered and tried to hide. And they knew it was _amused_.

Taijo's face was covered in blood when it came back into view, eyes, ears and nose bleeding as he fell back and scrambled desperately away from Tsukune, eyes bulging out and looking insane.

The Headmaster grabbed the talisman from Taijo's forehead and ripped it off. It immediately settled him, but they watched with disbelieving eyes as the talisman _screamed_ and shivered, trying to tear itself to pieces. The fire that consumed it was fast and they swore that the insentient paper looked _grateful_.

It left Taijo a wreck on the floor, shivering and huddling away from everyone, babbling his thanks to the Headmaster over and over again.

Tsukune _laughed_ and pulled the talisman off the back of his neck that was likewise trying to destroy itself and also incinerated it with a flick of his fingers, then picked up his suddenly frightened looking clothing and started putting them back on.

" _What_ was _that_?" Kuyou asked sharply.

"You wanted to verify I'm not human," Tsukune shrugged the jacket back on and started redoing his tie.

Taijo broke out into a broken semi-hystical laugh, "Not human!! Definitely not human!!!" he stressed, quivering away from Tsukune.

"What did you _see_!?" Kuyou snapped impatiently.

"He doesn't remember. The talisman I put on him acted as an external memory. What he saw wasn't stored into his brain. When the talisman was destroyed the memory died. Nothing can retrieve it," the Headmaster explained simply.

"Then how does he _know_ that Aono's not human!?" he demanded. "If he can't remember-"

"The memory still went through him. His eyes still saw what they saw, his ears heard what they heard. There was damage done no matter how gentle Mr. Aono was."

"And _what_ exactly did he _see_!? If Aono's not human then _what_ is he!?"

The Headmaster froze, reluctant to answer but -

"Eldritch," Tuskune chimed in, pulling his cuffs crisp and smooth, saying it like the answer was simple. The Headmaster winced.

The group froze. "Don't be absurd," Kuyou eventually snapped, voice quivering slightly. "Eldritch are a myth. They don't exist."

"Like monsters?" asked Tsukune mildly, turning that infuriating amused smile on them, freezing them. Because suddenly they _knew_ what was wrong with his eyes.

They weren't eyes at all. They were _holes_ … and something was behind them, _looking out_.

Tsukune quirked his lips. "I decided I wanted to experience this world. A monster-only High School seemed like an amusing place to do it. No annoying questions about where I came from. And I am an exceptionally _young_ Eldritch," he admitted, picking up the discarded knife handle and tossing it between his hands. "When you look at it I'm practically a _baby_ , so going to a school seemed like a fitting destination." He held up the handle, considered it briefly, then swallowed it in a smooth movement. "Of course I offered something in exchange. I mean, I might be an Abomination but I'm not unmannered."

The horrifying thing was that Kuyou suddenly believed him - it?

"What? What could possibly be enough to grant you entry?" he whispered.

Tsukune grinned, again all _wrong_. "How cute. You think I had to be granted anything." He stood up from his lean against the desk. "I own this dimension. Well, I own a lot of dimensions so that's nothing special. I was being _polite_. Sure I could do whatever I wanted, but it's much more _fun_ to do anything with someone else smoothing the edges. And I'm giving a service in return for the trouble!"

"There is something in this world that no one can kill. The best we've been able to do was force it to sleep. Mr. Aono has given his Word that he will take care of the problem," the Headmaster explained.

The Committee froze, because they all _knew_ what he was talking about. They'd been scouted already, even if they hadn't decided yet.

Alucard. Fairy Tale.

Tsukune patted Kuyou's cheek languidly. "I'd advise you to behave little fox. You're not currently my prey. Don't make yourself one." He bowed slightly to the Headmaster, respectful but lightly mocking. "I will be returning to class now Headmaster."

They were silent as he walked out the door.

"I strongly recommend you all refrain from upsetting Mr Aono. We are fortunate that he is amused by us. It would also be wise to take this knowledge to your grave. I will take extreme measures to ensure that if I must."

Like hell were they willing to do _anything_ to get that thing annoyed at them! It was playing right now. _No one_ wanted an Abomination angry.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Yes, Tsukune is an Eldritch Abomination in this. In this fic, there is no Aono family. He literally made a human body and is trasindentally existing within it. He did not steal or kidnap anyone to do this. 
> 
> The theme is that Eldritch Abominations own dimensions, like we own our own stomach bacteria, and just like a bacteria can't comprehend the existence of the being they exist in, humans/monsters can't comprehend the existence of an Eldritch. That doesn't even mean they're evil. It's just hard to understand and empathize with your bacteria's trials, tribulations, and lifestyle choices.
> 
> I'd love to see someone else use this theme. To my knowledge I'm the first to do an Eldritch!Tsukune


End file.
